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Багатодітний татусь показав реалії батьківства

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Саймон - фото 1
Саймон / static.boredpanda.com

Саймон Хупер, батько чотирьох прекрасних дівчаток, за допомогою соціальної мережі показав, яким насправді є батьківство.

Старшій його донечці 9 років, молодшій – 6, а близняткам всього 10 місяців. Світлини своєї малечі він опубліковує на своєму Instagram.

Well that was fun. @mother_of_daughters is away with the eldest 2 so I have the twins. Delilah was up & down last night more than a yoyo who'd necked a crate of redbull. As a dad, I usually have inbuilt noise cancelling and can sleep through an thrash metal gig but last night was something else. The neighbours must have thought I was skinning cats with a wooden spoon at 3.30am - the noise was endless - the kind of noise that cuts through you & drains you of any memory of who you are or what you're doing until your brain dribbles out you ear. They seem to have forgotten the whole experience and moved on. I'll just scoop up my eye bags so they don't drag on the floor. To top it all, the car is broken so I can't get to my brother's birthday. A shocker of a day so far. #brainonthefloor #alongwiththeeyebags #brokencar #twins #comehomeplease #parenting #fatherofdaughter #dadlife #instadad

Фото опубликовано Simon (@father_of_daughters)

Cooking with the family is important so that they get an early interest in what healthy eating is all about. But when you add two 10 month work experience kitchen hands to the mix who have minimum training and hygiene standards that would get a greasy kebab placed closed down, Jamie Olivers 15 minutes meals turn into Simon hooper's 90 minute botch jobs. In the end you just chuck it all in and hope for the best. The likelihood is that it will get rejected by the discerning clientele anyway. Might as well just short cut the whole process and chuck the raw food directly into the bin. #masterchefiaint #sausageandchipsitis #worstworkexperienceever #ottieatearawgarlicwhole #whydowebother #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad

Фото опубликовано Simon (@father_of_daughters)

I seem to forget to feed myself sometimes. I can get to 5pm and realise I've had nothing other than a cup of tea that's been microwaved 5 times and has a skin on it that's thicker than I feel after watching a documentary of dark matter. The twins, on the other hand, get 3 square meals a day spooned directly into their mouths. I tried crouching between them in the hope @mother_of_daughters would feed me too (FYI I don't have tiny arms) although I was rumbled by Delilah who kicked up a fuss. They have absolutely zero loyalty or compassion for me. Get between these girls & their food and you may just lose a finger. #noidonthavetinyarms #foodoverfathers #arewefeeders #theydontsharefood #nowonderimlosingweight #microwavetea #fatherofdaughters #instadad #dadlife

Фото опубликовано Simon (@father_of_daughters)

"Вони вже пересуваються по дому зі швидкістю світла. Безшумно, немов наймані вбивці. Варто на хвилину відвести погляд, і вони вже розбирають мій велосипед, з ніг до голови покриті ланцюгами й мастилом", – розповідає Саймон.

So after 2 hours of prep work (I'm quite the master of makeup these days), we went into the night to knock on random people's doors and essentially force them to hand over sweets. If you're wondering, Anya is Mary queen of Scots, Marnie is a cat, I'm the scariest thing of all - a father of 4 daughters on the edge of sanity after a stupidly early wake up this morning - ffrreeeaaakkkyy! After an hour of walking around, we turned for home with 1 kilo of sugar (some of which were obviously left over sweets from last year) that will no doubt keep the kids up for hours to come. oh the joy. Happy Halloween all. #wifeysavedthedaywiththecostumes #doesthisnotcountasrobbery #halloween #toomuchsugar #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad

Фото опубликовано Simon (@father_of_daughters)

У Саймона більше 190 тис. підписників.

Is it only me or do all men learn to sleep on an 8 inch strip at the edge of the bed? Irrespective of the size of the bed, or how many people are in it, I always find myself relegated to the 'man zone'. I've become so used to sleeping on this limited area of bed real estate, that I'm confident that I could sleep on top of a wall & not fall off. On the other side of the bed (the promised land), @mother_of_daughters sleeps like a star fish all night long, kneeing me in the back and generally complains about me coming to bed too late, being too cold or my foot encroaching onto her territory. At least the bed's nice and warm, even if the reception isn't sometimes! I hope that next Sunday, on #NationalLieInDay, I'll not only gain another hour in bed, but more space - but it's doubtful ! If you want to regain that hour (and some space for that matter) click in the link in my bio, loads of great prizes to be won @SimbaSleep #bedrealestate #livingontheedge #girls #twins #daughters #therestoomanygirls #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad #gopro

Фото опубликовано Simon (@father_of_daughters)

"Хочу показати, як насправді виглядають сім'я і діти з точки зору батьків. У соцмережах занадто багато прикрашають дійсність стосовно виховання дітей. Прагну поділитися з іншими, як це – бути батьком насправді, причому не без гумору".

Читайте також: "Дбайливий" татусь зняв танок виховательки замість дітей

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